My internal bit of selfish…

Like most women I think my lover should be able to read my mind. Based on endless hours of conversation she should know how to endear herself in that special corner of my heart, but the realist?  The realist is me knows better. So I’ll share something with you…

I’m used to not having… whether its attention… material things… or affection… (shrugs). I’m kinda used to doing things for myself. To be honest… I think conditioned might be a better word. I’ve been conditioned to just do things… well… for myself. The result? I struggle with the concept of leaning on someone else… depending on someone else… needing someone else to be there for me, and just plain asking for what I want.

So today… I’m telling deep dark secrets… giving you an inside look into what makes my heart beat fast.

My favorite colors are green and blue… depends on my mood.

I love to cook… but for a change…secretly I would love it if breakfast, lunch or dinner magically appeared for me.

I’m not a ‘women’s libber’ I love having doors opened for me… chairs pulled out… heavy things carried… treat me like a LADY.  I don’t always need it… but it’s nice to have the offer.

My favorite forms of affection are hugs… front… back… side… just hug me damn it!

Mmm … I love kisses… on the lips… forehead… palm of my hand… Eskimo… just kiss me already!

Tell me what you’re feeling… tell me about your family… tell me about your past… tell me what you’re thinking… talk to me… I need it.

I adore martial arts movies… my favorite is The Storm Riders… (I have it on VHS yeah… yeah I know) and I’ve been looking for it on DVD, but it looks like I’ll have to hunt it down online.

I love Roses… orange, yellow, white, pink…but secretly I love Orchids and Bamboo… especially that curly bamboo.

I love Horror Movies… mainly because I don’t like to be afraid of anything so it’s kind of my version of shock therapy lol.

Come away with me… let’s take a trip… can I interest you in a Bed and Breakfast, cabin on the mountain, a plane ticket to someplace exotic? Or a day trip to Philly, AC, DC…. Shit ANYWHERE… so long as I’m with you.

I love Honeysuckle, Jasmine, and Sunflowers… poetry… chocolate… mangos… mmmm

Rub my back… conversations in the dark… wash my dishes… tell me a joke…

Sunrise… sunset… rainy days… rainy nights… thunderstorms…. Mmmm…

Read to me… something you love… something you wrote… the phone book…the alphabet… Woman I don’t care… it’s the sound of your voice I crave…

Paint my bedroom ceiling… feed my pets… charge my cell phone, tell me I’m smart….

Hold my hand… pray with me… walk with me in the rain… let’s make some snow angels…

Stand on the pier with me… tell me a story… learn to do something I love, simply because I love to do it.

Look at me when the makeup is off… my glasses are on… and tell me… I’m beautiful… and for the love of God… MEAN IT.

Dance with me… Sing with me… laugh with me…

Buy me something… I don’t care if it costs $1.00 or $1,000.00… something… anything… let me know I was on your mind…

Like my mom’s cooking… but love mine (yup…yup… I said it…) tell me about something exotic and different you’d like to eat… tell me what your favorite food is.

Keep me company in the kitchen… I don’t always need it… but MAN… it’s just plain… sweet .

Rub my neck when I don’t feel good… hold me till I fall asleep…

If you’re a painter… paint something for me… If you’re a singer… sing something for me… if you’re a writer… write something for me… if you’re a teacher… teach me something… if you’re a dancer… well… dance.

I love animals with a special love affair going on with anything feline… Lions…. Tigers… Leopards… sigh…

I love the circus… the zoo… the theater… want to see Evita… come with me to Monster Jam… Jersey Boys… Rent… Rock of Ages… mmmm possibilities.

Sit through the ballet with me… or opera… what about the symphony?

Take me to your favorite places… show me your favorite things…

Make love to me… make me see stars… find my tender spots…

Touch me like you mean it… like it’s important to you… like I’m important.

To simplify… what I give to you… give it back… isn’t that easy?

 

–          Nova

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